Isolated

Because I've been so sick for the past month, I have started feeling extremely isolated and lonely. I crave some intimacy with my husband, yet I can't stand for him to touch me at the moment. I would love some aspect of a social life, yet I can't go out because I feel too ill. I have had to skip two work functions, cancel my trash the dress shoot, and skip Debbi's bachelorette party tonight.

Shannon kindly offered to come over today, but alas, she's sick herself, so it didn't work out. While I definitely want her home resting up, it's a bit of a bummer. Brad is away all day and night at Rob's bachelor party (including going to a strip club, I believe - something a frumpy, sick, pimply pregnant lady doesn't want to hear), and then half of tomorrow as well, and I was looking forward to the company. I tried having my mom stop by after she closed the shop but she said she had to pack for her doll show tomorrow and couldn't.

I don't get to hardly ever sit and just be with Brad anymore - as I'm either sick, sleeping, or he's running off to the store for me, taking care of the cats, doing the laundry, or whatever other household chores have to get done while I lie around trying not to puke. It's sad, and frustrating, and lonely.

I hope this goes away after the first trimester. Some women are sick their whole pregnancy. I pray that I am not one of those women, because I need to start feeling normal again.

I am about to go shower - I spent most of today lying on the couch, re-reading Kate Gosselin's book (I can't stand her, but the story of the birth of the sextuplets is fascinating). I may try and bead a little tonight, as I really, genuinely, want to get the Etsy store back running properly. I also need to put my photo cd together for the Studios magazine - something I should have done last weekend.

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